Monthly Archives: February 2013

Numinous Revelations

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBh3ZWoDzuo

I feel the benevolent flowing through my veins,
I mean sincerely to suggest that I am,
No longer filled with blood,
I am nothing but words,
Stanza after stanza,
Comma after comma,
Flushed through my being,
As water finds the path of least resistance…

And I wonder do you feel the same,
Do you feel like I do,
That the benevolent flows through you?
May I flow through you?
May I flow,
Like liquid gold,
Into the many crevices of you,
Creating an idol of our mutual consent,
An idol of required emotion,
And furious passion,
My loins yearn for you,
As does my amygdala,
Comma after comma…

I feel the benevolent flowing through me,
My limbs alive with words like;

Magnanimous
Fruitless
Penniless
Pauper
Fool…

Am I a fool?

Negligent in the way that I propose these commas,
Do you understand?
Can you?
Will you… Let me be for you,
What you have always dreamed,
Surely you have dreamed,
And did not yet know… it is I and I and I,
Let me be for you,
The glue that holds your sanity shredded together,
Let me be for you,
Madonna and Whore,
Muse and Siren,

GRACE.

Understood through transient glimpses,
Those unlock your soul,
And let me dangle…

Am I a fool?
May I be your fool…

I long to be your monkey… 5 words at a time.

Do I drip with sarcasm,
That needs to be wiped from my lips,
As love has been from my life,
Do I ooze sardonicism,
In this prolific unraveling,
Of all that is me,
Because of the benevolent,
Is it my fault?
It has to be my fault!

It is my fault… drip, drip, drip…

I’m coming for you,
Will you come for me…

Drip, drip, drip…

I feel the benevolent flowing through my veins,
No wonder that I am fragmented,
Torn and tormented,
Tortured and surrendering,
As the power of the prismatic glory,
Drenches out from my pores,
Into your consciousness,
I and I and I intoxicated,
By the very promise and possibility of you,
The promise,
Love unyielding,
The possibility daily conveyed,
These words do touch you,
As I and I and I,
Unsure,
Though I know,
The benevolent commands it…

Here I come…

Drip, drip, drip…

It is my fault!

Though the benevolent among you,
Correct me,
Embrace me,
Envelop me,
You turn me on…

Correct I and I and I,
Feel the power,
The numinous realizations,
Of an empathy,
Unraveled,

It is my fault…

Will you still love me?

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

By The Time I Die


Premonitions of death have haunted me for years,
Always the same way and always the same time,
Though the exact timing of my death is a year long,
And I think I’ve come up with a way to battle that possibility,
Yet,
It is with this in mind,
That I entreat my own mind to figure out exactly what I’d like to do,
By the time I die;

I’d like to travel all five continents,
Visiting cities of storied pasts,
Homes of grandeur and delight,
I’d like to eat a perfect meal,
Cooked by the worlds greatest chef
And no I don’t mean me,
I’d like to drive a sports car around the Nurburing,
Smash up a Veryon,
Fight twelve rounds with a welterweight boxer,
Apologize to every person I have ever hurt,
Make peace with everyone I love,
Give as much money as I can to charitable causes,
Travel the world’s great railways,
The Orient and Siberian expresses,
I’d like to travel the world’s greatest river ways,
On a magical boat,
Where the wine never stops flowing,
I’d like to scale a mountain in Banff,
Several in fact,
Returning to Canmore and happier memories,
Then off to Kilimanjaro,
I’d like to paint a painting,
Self portrait,
And I promise I will keep both my ears,
Join the Cirque de Soleil for one star performance,
Jump on the stage at Stratford,
Perform the prologue from Henry IV,
Have my own cooking show,
Still working on the name but,
The Tipsy Chef sure sounds like a great name,
I’d like to find paradise,
Would you like to come?
Like that should be difficult,
I’d love to find a Rosetta Stone that answers all of life’s greatest mysteries,
Starting with Why?
I’d like to write the great novel,
Several anthologies of poems,
Swim in the Aegean Sea,
Eat chocolate in Switzerland with old friends and new,
I’d like to own a restaurant,
Just once,
And maybe for not too long,
Limited run,
One month,
Perhaps for my fortieth birthday,
I’d like to have a suit,
Zegna,
Perfectly tailored to my body,
A pair of shoes made to my feet, just once,
Custom made linen suits from India,
Create my own pair of cufflinks,
Spend ten days in absolute silence,
Start a university,
That seeks to solve world issues, one a time,
Until they are all solved,
And then everyone graduates Magna Cum Laude,
I’d like to try a stand up set in a comedy powerhouse,
Maybe Caroline’s,
I’d like to record some music,
Perhaps to Bach or Mozart,
But with my lyrics,
I’d like to touch everything in the Winter Palace,
And sit and imagine in the Kremlin,
At the Politburo,
And imagine what had been going through their minds,
I’d like to meet the Pope,
And politely give him a piece of my mind,
I’d like to give my Mother a Rolls Royce convertible to read in,
My Father either a Piaget or an Aston Martin,
I’d like to have Leonard Cohen sing my song,
I’d like to give each of my Brothers and Sisters,
Whatever their heart desires within reason,
I’d like to tell the world as loud as I can,
How fucked up it is the way we live,
I’d like to visit the Tokyo Fish market,
Fiji,
Bali,
And live in a glasshouse,
Made by me in the rainforest,
I’d like to write, produce and cast no less than twenty plays,
I’d like to start a massive library,
My library,
Like in Meet Joe Black, but bigger and more spectacular,
Filled with first editions,
That on my death would become the property of the people,
I’d like to start playing the trumpet again,
Swim with sharks,
Touch a manta ray,
And a tiger, a lion, a monkey,
Love to see Gorillas in their natural habitat,
Eat Fugu,
Learn how to make Conch chowder from a local,
Go to a fresh saffron farm,
Plant and tend to the perfect English Garden,
I’d like to have high tea, at the Savoy,
Or perhaps Buckingham Palace,
I’d love to swing through the jungle like Tarzan,
Wrestle a crocodile,
Reread every book I have ever read and written,
Write, produce and make a great blockbuster movie,
But not before my Indy,
I’d like to drive an F-1 car, once, and for three seconds,
Ride in a hot air balloon,
Jump out of an airplane,
Sign someone’s name in the air with a smoke prop,
Start riding horses again,
Specifically across a beach in Cuba,
Own a massive wine cellar made by my hand and selection,
Visit every major and grandiose library the world over,
Throw a weekend bash in a storied castle in Ireland,
And then Scotland,
Win a Nobel,
A Pulitzer,
An Emmy,
An Academy Award,
The Booker,
Lecture at Oxford,
I’d like to drink a Petrus 56,
And really visit the Green Fairy,
VEGAS BABY,

I’d like all this and more by the time I die! But this seems like a pretty good start…

And then, of course, there was YOU!

Rendering all this useless, without, your smile

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The Gravitational Force of Light

In the darkness devoured,
My soul had sunk into Virgil’s pit,
Where Dante laughed,
As Cerberus feasted on my desolations,
Wanderlust and curious fascinations,
Believing that this was home,
Until you,
When screaming and tortured souls
Have been instantly transformed,
By the angelic quality of your smile,
The once gathering clouds have abated,
Giving way to a beauty reserved for
What dreams may come,
And come they have,
You have,

The gravitational force of light, of love,
Unleashing in me an elegant reappraisal,
Of all I thought was true,
On this journey of self discovery,
Muse,
Blessed deity without compromise,
Enlightenment in your poise,
As reminiscences of Aphrodite call to my heart strings with hushed murmurs of your name,
Everything once known is foreign,
Everything once foreign is known,
As now I beseech you to open your sixth sense,
Such that you can devour what you already know is true,
Or should,
For hand in hand,
As our eyes locked,
And our words tangled,
We both felt at ease,
When was the last time I felt at ease?
You?
So while you shine,
Which you effortlessly do,
Beaming positive radiance,
Defying space, logic and time,
May I please adore you,
That your smile brighter dislodge this trembling existence ,
May I take care of you,
Allowing you to see a life lighter,
May I profess universal truths,
That you yourself have revealed to me,
May I beseech you,
Implore you,
Revere you
And beg,
That you,
Return to,
Sender?

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Challenging Contradictions

Challenging contradictions,
Juxtapositions and superstitions,
How can one love so much,
And in the same neuron firing incident,
Find a nagging pain that tears at the soul,
Tears streaming down a face,
Hardened by a life of a desire,
Forged by a life of challenge,
Drawn and withdrawn,
Laying on a bed of discontent,
Seeking to understand the unfathomable,
Seeking the address that which is beyond,
Redress,
Love falls to the way side,
And yet filters back up through the proverbial spring of life,
Every thought one has of the yearned for prize,
Requited love,
Kisses that flow like the tides,
Touches that burn like the sun,
Love,
Sweet and gentle love,
Wildly passionate and throbbing love,
Why,
O why,
Must you be so transient?
Must you abandon?
Must you die?
As Hemingway said;
“True love can never end happily,”
Sentiments that resonate with every fiber of a lovers being,
For the choices are stark,
Your lover may die,
Or your lover may fade into retraction,
Either way,
Losing,
A waterfall of treacherously maligned emotions,
The once soothing and succulent advance,
Of love,
Sugary like toffee,
Sticking to your insides,
As you lick your fingers,
Trying to get every last bit of goodness,
Only to discover,
That a once dream like fantasy,
Is now the war of the roses?
Minus the war,
And minus the roses,
A stalemate,
Though not peace,
Where art thou Lady Justice in love?
The once greatest success of the soul,
Now the tortured failure of living each day,
Alone,
Without you,
Love.

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The Importance of Muse (4)

Until you,
Seemingly wolves in sheep’s clothing appeared,
Devouring me from within,
When I should have been,
Without,
Sirens with majestic voices,
Calling out like muses in the night,
Stars in my sky,
Alchemist trickery,
Deflowering my own genesis,
Drawing me ever nearer,
Deeper,
To an Escher like Nirvana,
Illusive and never ending,
An optical illusion delivered by all senses,
Making no sense at all,
And there was you,
IS YOU,
Who with an enchanted smile,
Divine eyes
And a disarming personality revealed to me the folly of my ways,
Fool to Sirens calling,
As if, in a lifelong daze, I was stuck in a riddle I could not solve,
The enigma of Oracles, Sages, Poets and Lovers alike,
The passion kindled, kindling, those alight a flame so filled with desire,
It dampens the sun
And brightens the moon,
Reflected in the dancing glaze of your surprise,
That in that moment and this,
You and I both can see,
Hear, feel, smell, taste and
Know what until now has eluded us,
Muse,
My sweetest temptation
And my most dangerous aspiration,
For at once you inspire the beauty in truth
And yet the fear of the unknown,
Unknowing,
Nevertheless having an abiding faith in the unseen,
That great anonymous that now in you, Muse,
Has both a face and a name,
And I am forever changed by your grace.

Muse,
Until you,
I have dreamed of your arrival,
Feeling the betrothal of your spirit a time or two before,
Knowing since my birth you would appear,
But not like this,
Not like now,
Holding your hand,
Feeling the impulses of your soul,
Wanting to entreat your pain
And make it mine own,
Entreat your covert undiscovered recesses,
Hidden even from you,
Becoming illuminated by the light which shines from me,
Chosen,
Because of you,
No longer a hypothesis or some ill conceived notion,
But instead,
The very embodiment of everything I have ever sought,
Finding faith in your smile,
Delivered from my own demons,
Every voice inside my head pointing me in one direction,
Yours,
Muse,
Unlike those Sirens beckoning my destruction,
You have unleashed my creation,
Finding anew the strength to profess my conviction,
That this,
THIS is not fiction,
These words dancing across your eyes,
Your eyes dancing across my soul,
Faith,
Bold and intense,
In all that I see in you,
Hiding behind that thin veil,
The walls that have been carefully constructed,
That I now long to piece apart,
One missive expression of joy and shadowed bliss at a time,
Muse,
No longer cryptic,
For I have unearthed the answer to your question,
Unasked,
Unsought,
Yet herein I will fight,
For you,
Muse.

Muse,
Until you,
How could it be,
That I could be so confused,
Blinded by a lifetime of refined repression,
Intent on projection,
Rather than the true expression,
Of what now seems so obvious,
Until you,
I was like a rough diamond,
Or perhaps a diamond in the rough,
Waiting for the polish of your vision,
To let me see my own worth,
Unleashed by your smile,
Divine,
Your eyes,
Inviting me to a netherworld,
Neither real nor imagined,
But perhaps supposed,
Although now I know,
I know,
Until now,
Muse,
I have waited for this moment to find that mate,
Soul;
With whom to share my everything,
The good, the bad and the ugly,
Unraveling in each of us,
The tightened knots of our struggle to survive,
Where now I can see,
We two,
Can thrive.

Muse,
Your importance,
Can never be underrated,
Will never be understood,
As aloof,
I sit here,
Physically miles apart,
While our souls are clearly colliding,
And I know faith,
For once,
Now,
For bringing you,
To me,
No longer the Siren song,
But instead Muse’s,
Yours,
Melody,
A lifetime of songs we two to share,
Muse,
I sit here longingly awaiting,
Your triumphal return,
Prodigal,
To me,
And a life,
Of inspiration, dedication, passion and desire,
We on fire,
Just as when our eyes met
And the electricity flowed through our veins,
Hands held,
Directly to our hearts,
Fluttering,
With possibilities,
That soon will become,
Daily returns,
To love.

Return to Sender.

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Close Your Eyes

Close your eyes, have no fear

Pray I,
Will you submit,
Allow me this courtesy of gestures rare,
Placing my hands upon you,
Pray you,
Feel the warmth of my soul,
The immediate sensation liberating me,
Undeniable the effect your aura inspires,
My deepest thoughts now fade away,
Firmly rooted in you and only you,
Momentarily,
As our souls ,
Like universal waves,
Crash into our consciousness,
Let silence reign as they commune,
Our souls,
Two alike,
Both searching for something more,
Meaning in a life that has become cluttered,
Affected by the constant drone of so called advance,
Pray I,
Close your eyes,
Leave that world behind,
As I entreat,
Feel the powerful intention,
Of one reaching out for another,
Of me reaching out for you,
Hoping, no, knowing if you shall let me,
I will
Stroke your insecurities,
While acknowledging mine,
Silence still our beacon,
Words unnecessary,
As our eyes meet,
Gleaming from unspoken sensibilities,
Conducting a survey of the emotional feast before us,
The physical entrapments,
Of our own intense design,
That tonight we may be free from worry or constraint,
Pray I,
Together,
Inhibitions lost,
Paradise found,
That tonight,
We may dream a dream a thousand times or more,
Let’s defy the laws of time and space,
And stay blessedly trapped,
In a moment such as this,
Live out a reality that seeks to change our conceptions,
Unshackle our reticence,
In a moment,
That precise moment where we have thrown caution to the wind,
Hand in hand,
Guided by a creeping suspicion,
That something new and wondrous,
Has rung a bell,
And that a new round has begun,
The life cycle of passionate resonance,
Can you feel it,
Will you allow yourself to luxuriate,
Will you allow freedom to inflict upon your soul,
The waves of a resolute blushing craze,
To touch you,
To reverberate through your spirit,
To enchant,
To pilot you to an endearing collapse,
Celebrating anew,
Pray I you,
Close your eyes,
Feel the tender warmth,
Without words,
You effect with such ease,
Have no fear,
Fear not the unmistakable,
What is expressed in this quiet room,
Silent,
On this delightful night,
No matter where we shall be,
Concern and consideration not our reward this night,
As I adore you,
Placing my hands,
Wishing the invitation of your great esteem,
That so stunningly radiates from your frame,
That so perfectly conceals the giant within,
Pray I,
That together we might know peace,
Of mind,
Of body,
And soul,
Dreaming as lovers do,
Laughing as children might,
Thinking as sages repressed,
Giving in,
To that initial touch,
Pray I…

Close your eyes, have no fear.

Come back… to me!

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

The Anguish Of A Sentence Not Perfected

Time and again,
I will write a line,
Create it,
Only to destroy it,
Believing that in its shattering,
A more perfect union,
A more perfect representation will manifest,
Just like my destiny,
To crisscross this earth,
In search of you,
My sweet dalliance,
Seems a bizarre affront,
To my stream of consciousness,
Though my words are becoming more delicate now,
As I am aging,
Struggling to reveal myself to the world,
Not arrogance I assure you,
Self assuredness perhaps,
Though I suspect that it is more an inherent understanding,
Of all that is me,
At once true and untrue,
Fact and fiction,
So if it rubs you the wrong way,
I beseech you to accept my humble apologies,
Herein,
I am sorry if you misread these words,
Not understanding that they are your betrothal,
They are the gift of me,
To you,
Good, bad or indifferent,
I throw myself out to the wolves,
Those of the genesis,
Hoping to discover that as a sheep dressed in wolves clothing,
I am safe from the ravaging bites of self loathing,
Intense criticisms that would shock and awe you,
For I am not comfortable in this skin,
But daily,
Gaining momentum,
A literary rebel,
And I will rebel,
Against an attacker,
Who can not see that this bold statement,
These bold statements,
Are nothing more,
Than failed attempts,
At the perfect sentence,
To you jewels in a crown,
Or prizes in a Cracker Jack box,
Though for me,
Feeling,
Less than ideal,
This anguish I feel,
For a sentence,
Not yet perfected,

Though now fresh muse in sight,

The delight of that sentence seems manifest,

Destiny.

SDM

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized