Amorphophallus Titanium

Avenging my own unrelenting despair,

I and I,

And I,

In the same moment of space and time,

Dimensionally confused, refused, abused

And consumed,

Looking on myself from the outside,

As you see me,

Though none of you really can nor do,

Purging toxic stress,

Leaving me rattled and shaken,

The physics of my despair containing the meaning of life,

Yet I know,

Each day… survival is the name of the game,

Though soon I will,
Thrive,

As Muse will guide the way.

 

Presupposing that I was meant,

To feel this pain and suffering,

That it was mine by birthright,

Divine majesty of terrific torture,

This Black Dog screams,

Not knowing what is in store,

Though knowing that it involves words,

Words from you,

Those propel me on,

Pushing me from my own unrelenting struggle,

Pulling me to an awaiting greatness,

Pulling me ever closer,

Through the laws of motion,

To you,

Muse,

Who will set me free.

 

These words,

To you, may seem nothing more,

Than something which defines life,

But to me,

A word is power,

An unnerving power that jangles my cage,

And causes,

Sobering thoughts,

Plagued by a mind that never stops,

Both blessing and curse,

Hiding behind a well rehearsed smile,

And a thin veneer of extroverted exuberance,

That so few of you can see.

 

Introspective,

And reclusive,

Most nights,

I sit in the darkness,

Pondering a world I’ve left behind,

Gladly, as it surely would have killed me,

And a new world,

Unfurling right before my eyes,

Daily,

Reminding me that this struggle,

It is the joyful transition that makes me me,

I and I and I aware,

Like,

Amorphophallus titanium,

Ravishing to be sure,

As surely she will be,

My Muse,

She that will guide me from my darkness with nothing more,

Than her radiant soul,

Majestic spirit,

And what I know will be beautiful big brown eyes.

 

Diligent,

You have honoured me,

The Ether,

Giving me this blessing and curse,

And I in turn,

Honour you,

I and I and I

Acknowledging those imperious,

But leaving them,

Behind,

As I go forward,

Will you come with me?

Oh Buddha,

Whatever God there is,

He/She/It/They,

Let loose the hounds of hell,

My Black Dog,

Bring to me my greatest temptation,

A Muse,

To alight the fire in my soul,

To inspire the fire in all those around me…

I long to be slave to your master,

Love,

Of Muse,

Delivering me from me,

For you…

 

SDM

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